Happy Halloween

Happy Halloween!

legs not required

i've been daydreaming of far off places and falling in love the color aqua.  so many changes taking place these days that i forget where i am and im just fine with that.  the word home is beginning to take on new meaning with the realization that i belong everywhere.  maybe there is no plot of land that will ever feel permanent and maybe my home is simply the world.  but wouldn't you think im the girl -the girl who has everything.  

life on mars

some people stumble upon a field of dirt and see... well, a field of dirt. other people see themselves existing on a rusty planet floating around in space not so far away. its vast openness beckoning a new beginning for creation. like a blank canvass awaiting a masterpiece. beauty can be found anywhere. even in the most unlikely places. it can be created out of anything with your imagination. its fun to play with your perception of things. i'm practicing at looking closer, and looking deeper into what first comes across as ordinary or negative. im finding that changing my outlook on the muddy things in life, it gives me way more understanding of why i am here. to grow. to learn. to love. and to be.  

wonderland

“Why, sometimes I've believed as many as six impossible things before breakfast.”
― Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

 "if i had a world of my own, everything would be non-sense"... you would be able to smell every color, and listen to the rainbows.  everyone would bathe in the clouds and borrow raindrops to use as tears when they are happy. nobody would ever be lonely because they'd have all the flowers as their friends, and they'd cherish their quiet time in the mornings with the nightingales. we would all eat strawberry cake for breakfast and swim in lavender lagoons at noon.  we'd ride on butterflies and sing silly songs to the moon until we forgot the time, then laugh...because there's no such thing as time. no yesterdays, no tomorrows, only right now. to stay forever young and for us to do whatever we want. to be whoever we are. 
"If you don't know where you are going, any road will take you there"... 

ferris wheel

i took a ride on a ferris wheel

 i felt it going up, i felt it going down

 but i remember when it stopped, and that moment at the top

 beautiful and bittersweet

 some things are meant to be brief 

but i sure loved the way it made me feel

 so i took another ride on the ferris wheel

you never end up with a maybe

the daisies are out and showing us how to grow wild, free and beautiful. from a distance they look like sparkles in the grass when the wind blows, or fireflies in a meadow after dusk. its magical. i wanted to pick a hundred and one of them to take home and put in a jar, but i know i would have felt bad about it later.  although, i did single out my favorite to pick it's petals, one by one, he loves me...he loves me not.. cause that's just what you do with daisies. i know for sure that he still loves me. its the most logical way to find out, i'm sure of it. it feels nice to connect with nature again.  i don't know why i deny myself of that simple, easy pleasure sometimes. i suppose we all go through phases like that, but the more time i spend outside with the trees, the more connected i am to myself, and what really matters.

bring on the new days & new ways

when you want many different things in your life that can not all exist at the same time, does that mean that you do not know what you want? Or, is it in fact possible, that you desire these things because you are supposed to have them -ALL of them. don't let anyone ever accuse you of being unrealistic, or a "dreamer", or... someone who "doesn't know what she wants," because you are meant to have the moon and all of the stars too. it isn't up to us to try and make sense of the timing and arrival of our desires. we can only trust and know that they are coming. and, that there is always something so amazing right around the corner because we believe it is there, and that life is meant to be abundant. we are living in a crazy time right now. i can feel it every day. like butterflies multiplying by the thousands inside my body. my emotions are stirring more than ever these days and its mostly because i do not know... i do not know what is next.  But here is what i am certain of ...no matter what, i'm going to be ok. i've always been more than ok.  i have a beautiful life that i have co-created with my own free will, and i am exactly where i am supposed to be on the path that i have chosen. even though the path feels a little scary and dramatic at the moment, it is all just part of the story. my story, and yours. 

believing is seeing

Life itself is the most wonderful fairy tale there is.

good morning dawn

 

today, i woke up long before the time i had chosen to set my alarm. my soul must have been excited because i had no place to be, i just wanted to feel the morning.  the first thing i did was open all the windows in my apartment so i could smell the air and let the birds sing me into a new day.  this was more energizing than a thousand cups of coffee, so i decided to tickle my senses further and take a gentle walk down the road i drive almost every day.  it was like i was experiencing that street for the very first time.  i never knew of the tiny creek that trickles along side the asphalt and all the life that it brings to wildflowers and frogs and ferns, and i am sure of it that fairies play there too.  my pea coat and favorite scarf had never been out like this in the month of june.  the air was just so cold, and the fog thick, but i didn't mind. nothing else around me seemed to care either.

summer's here

these days i am longing for simplicity. summer is here and i want to soak up every moment of the little joys that it can bring by staying present. i wanna catch a fish from the river and cook it in a cast iron skillet with oil and breadcrumbs. i want to read a novel under my airy white sheets with all the bedroom windows open.  i plan to fall asleep under the stars far into the northern wilderness where i've never been.  i will play my guitar and sing new melodies to my poetry that make no sense and perfect sense all at the same time.  i will fall deeply in love with the mornings again and all the quiet peace it fills me with. i will hike the trails just up the road and collect flowers along the path to take home and press into that pretty leather journal i haven't known what to do with until this very moment.  i will lay in the sun collecting freckles that i will most likely regret later. i will let my hair go- wild and long, and breakup with makeup for while until i feel absolutely beautiful without it. i will dance under the moon and find that drumming circle i've been longing for.  i will meet beautiful new people to laugh with, to share wine and stories with, to grow with. so there it is... how will you spend your summer? 

baby its cold outside

  winter. everything with life is sleeping and getting ready to transform back into its true self. every year, right at this time, it feels like a new beginning is right around the corner. my days are starting to fill up with so many creative opportunities that i've actually spent time visualizing.  i believe there is great power in attracting the life that you want. i've been extra conscious of my thoughts, my words, beliefs and emotions, and intent. so, more than ever, i'm discovering what it truly means to create your own reality.  what goals are you setting for yourself? i'm picturing myself having already achieved them, and what that feels like. dreaming a dream will always stay what it is, a dream. but lets make them real by  creating them for ourselves! 

hello 2013, i've been waiting for you

from before the start of the new year, i've had this deep, encompassing desire to change my life.  all i really want is to feel an inner peace and unwavering fearlessness. i am here to  bring light into this world, that is all. that makes life seem so overwhelmingly simple. maybe it is that simple?  maybe we cloud everything up with roles and titles, and material possessions that pretend to give us our identity, give us our place in this world.  we've all heard it a thousand times before... underneath it all, we are all the same.  connected little souls on the same journey of self discovery.  i have some ideas of my own that might open myself up to a brand new world this year. stay tuned... :)

we collided

here in the twilight, just before sunrise, i've got a secret if you can promise to keep it

you are the star aligned with the beat of my heart 

when i found you i found me

so beautiful, we could be two comets blazing across the sky

crashing at the speed of light 

like the ending of a fairy tale, a magic that would never fail 

we could burn bright as the sun, ignite the world like no one's ever done if we 

collided.

and collided we did......

i love you jon armstrong.

sounds of the woods

falling deeply in love with the silence of the mornings has given me a new sense of the dawn.  the world feels still and the light milky.  the windows are wide open and the forrest is full of sounds from our fellow friends sipping on raindrops and scouring the dewy ground.  a tiny breeze softly moves the wind chime and the sound of magic floods my senses. fall has found me and for this i must celebrate.

if i were a doll, you would be my house

is good to be home. back to the panoramic forest that feels like it will soon weave its vines through these walls. it may want to wrap us up in a warm wooded embrace and whisper to us all, that we have always been one.  the golden light pours in, in prisms of green, yellow, orange, and red and my heart feels full and luminous.  warm milk warms our bodies as the cool air creeps in through cracks in the windows. these haunted halls tell stories of their own, and remind us of the wonders and magic that fill the earth. for there are many things we still do not know, for some my be revealed in short comings as we make ourselves quite.  i miss the cats that used to rule this place.  their independent souls began to cry out for our love and affection when we were grown and away, but they are somewhere else now.  i wonder if home will always be this place. if it always be here. i want to believe i am always wide open to change, but these walls watched me grow. within these rooms, i became myself.  and still,  becoming who i am.